I watched them, one by one get closer and closer. They usually come in pairs. Their palms sweaty, their throats sticky.

Clutching a pen and a program, they rehearse what they are going to say. They nudge each other, hoping to get the other to go first.

Finally, one of them gets the courage up and approaches Utah Jazz guard DeShawn Stevenson, who is sitting on the bench watching a game at the Rocky Mountain Revue.

"Can I have your autograph? "

It's a scene I've seen hundreds of times when covering NFL games, major league baseball or NBA games.

One of the first questions I'm asked when someone finds out I am a sports writer is how many autographs do I have and how many can I get?

The answer to both questions is the same -- none.

Since I've been covering sports, I've never asked a player for an autograph.

This new philosophy is a big change for me.

When I was 16, I remember being asked what I wanted for my birthday.

How about an autographed picture of me with Hall-of-Fame shortstop Robin Yount?

I thought I was being reasonable. I wasn't asking for a new car or something totally unreasonable.

I got socks instead. I got a dumb card with some mushy stuff from my mom and a boring book with an inscription from my dad.

I didn't give up my quest for a Robin Yount autograph. If I only had a press pass, then it would be so easy. So I wrote the Milwaukee Brewers requesting a press pass, but that didn't work. The Brewers had these stupid rules about only giving out press passes to those who worked for the media.

What about kids who needed an autograph?

Tough.

I eventually got my autograph of Robin Yount. I went to a Brewers spring training game in Las Vegas and got Yount along with several other Brewer players to autograph a baseball and my glove. I lost both years ago, and now couldn't care less.

It's funny. I still have that "dumb book " my dad gave me. It's on my nightstand next to my bed.

Being a sports writer has helped me realize that we are asking the wrong people for autographs.

Kobe Bryant has never done anything for me. Michael Vick never once helped me through a difficult time in my life. Robin Yount never sent me a Christmas card. And when I lost my job, I don't ever remember getting a note with a check to help me get through the month from Barry Bonds.

Last week, I had a chance to see one of my boyhood idols when I went to a David Gates concert in Sandy. He was the lead singer for a group called Bread that was huge in the 1970s.

After the concert, I was with some family who waited for the chance to meet him. We waited for 45 minutes. When he finally came out to board a shuttle, there were four of us and just one other person who was prepared with a program and a pen.

He politely asked for an autograph and was coldly refused.

Mr. Gates apparently had a 6 a.m. flight and Mr. Gates is a private person.

So what?

How hard would it have been to sign one autograph?

The experience reaffirmed my belief that our emphasis on what we value is out of balance.

If I collected autographs, I would try and get the autograph of Steve Cox, my sixth grade teacher. I would like one of LeVor Oldham, my former boss, and Jeff Gillespie, who patiently coached my son for years and never asked "What's in it for me? "

I would try and get David Sheen

Warner

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to sign my baseball. I would ask Cecil Clark, Larry Dahl, Everett Kelepolo, Alf Pratt, Jack Nelson, Leon Fletcher and my brother. They are all people who may not know this, but all helped change my life.

I realize it's not standard practice to go asking your father, mother, neighbor or teacher for an autograph. You can't bring a friend into your room and have them say "wow " because you have a B.J. Chandler autograph, but the least we can do for those who mean the most to us in our lives is to let them know they mean more than those who we foolishly worship.

Last week, I had an insightful conversation with former Provo High coach Jim Spencer, who is a Utah high school basketball legend.

He retired from coaching in the early 1980s. I was curious what he would say to those coaches and players who are still in high school. What has he learned from the years he's had to reflect on his life and his career?

"There was a British commander who was once asked what he would change if he could change anything and he said, 'I would give more praise.' As I look back on my life, I would be like the British commander. I would give more praise. I guarantee you, it would pay off. "

There will always be lines for autographs of famous celebrities. That will never change. But what could change is our emphasis on who is important in our lives.

When you idolize Kobe Bryant, Michael Jordan or Sammy Sosa, you will be disappointed.

The people who have made the biggest impact on my life aren't on TV. They are in my own house. They are next door. They are at school. Their number is programed into my cellphone.
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